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welcome, yo.
I don't know how you managed to stumble upon this blog, but yeah hello anyway. Feel free to explore and leave a tag, even though i know my tagboard's filled with nothing but adverts now. /:
CHERYL♥AVIARY;
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-bleep- !
Saturday, 28 January 2012 @ 18:46
Decided to bleep out his name from the previous posts, in case my parents happen to come across my blog.
Idk how they'd ever come across it, but oh well, better safe than sorry right?

Anything can happen. Just like how someone blog-hopped and saw everything, oh gosh. Luckily it wasn't my parents or bro .
New blogskin doesn't work on my phone! ):
Friday, 27 January 2012 @ 19:45
Argh i just realised my new blogskin doesn't work on the Blogger app on my phone ): i can't scroll down in the box containing all the stuff, i can only scroll down the entire page /:


Oh well..




P.S
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZHUOJINGGGGGG! <3 You're officially 16 YAY! Must meet up soon okayokay? :D Even though i know you wouldn't be seeing this. /:
Updating links section.
Wednesday, 25 January 2012 @ 22:34
Decided to update the links section of my blog. Whichever person deleted their blog, i'd remove the link. Whoever relinked, i'll relink. Whoever made their blog private :( , i'd still put the link there. Even if they don't use their blogs anymore but it still exists, i'll keep the link. So lets see how many have deleted their blogs...

Pasirians: From 29 links, i've reduced them to...16.
Hildans: From 22 links, i've reduced them to...16 also. O:
Family/Other friends: From 7 links, i've reduced them to...4.
Finally, Others/Shared Blogs: From 8 links, i've reduced them to...4 also.

Even among the 16,16,4 and 4 (wow all repeated numbers), less than 5 blogs are still alive.

Conclusion: Blogger, overall, isn't alive anymore.

So yeah bye. (:


P.S
你们都知道了,干吗不讲一声!): 害到我一直觉得那么内疚..
Sigh.
@ 22:11
死心了。
RYAN RETWEETED MEEEEEEEEE!
Monday, 23 January 2012 @ 11:13
OH . MY. GOSH. RYAN HIGA JUST MADE MY DAY!



CHECK THAT OUT! HE RETWEETED ME! :D


What i tweeted was this:
Hahahaha the accent made is hilarious ! "Ohh brah!" hahaha do they really talk like that ??


AND THEN HE RETWEETED IT! YAAAAAYYYYYY <33 !




He just made my first day of CNY better than ever. In fact, its the best CNY yet! :'D




Sooooo darn happy right now.
Okay i gotta go now. CNY family photo-taking time. Bye!


And HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!(:
New blogskin.
Friday, 20 January 2012 @ 17:58
Just changed my blogskin. Looks not bad to me.

I actually wanted some emo one saying some lovey-dovey (okay maybe not really) stuff, but i couldn't find one that had the message i wanted. Tried googling on how to create your own blogskin, but seems too chim for my simple mind to understand .

And then i stumbled upon this blogskin (i forgot how) . And decided to try it out.
So yeah here it is. (:
Broken.
@ 16:49
We.
Officially.
Broke up.
Yesterday.


The end.


P.S
Maybe this is better . I shall just focus on my studies without relationships disturbing me.
And secretly like -bleep- at the same time. 
Hildan Torch.
Sunday, 15 January 2012 @ 17:11
So last Friday was Hildan Torch. Shane had to carry the school flag for the march-in of the CCA colours , so she couldn't hold Choir flag. Hence, i had to stand in for her and hold the Choir flag. On the first rehearsal , we were given our places to stand. Mr Lian read out the names of those standing on the right first. My name wasn't read. Then, he continued with the left side.

In my mind, i was wondering, who will be the one in front of me, the one whom i'll be following their footsteps?

Then Mr Lian read: "Badminton, Hockey, Volleyball boys, Hildan Chorale..."

Oh. Shit.

Those were the only words in my mind back then, i remember. I'm standing behind -bleep-!  -BLEEP- !

I didn't know if it was a good thing or not. One part of me was jumping for joy, being able to be so close to someone i loved since Sec 1 (kinda). But another part of me was all upset. Why did i have to stand behind him? I'm trying so so hard to forget him, and this had to be such a perfect chance to make me fall in love with him all over again. Its not that we'd talk, but to be honest, standing behind him and watching him, would kinda make me go crazy already. I was hoping i wouldn't see him so often anymore, so i could slowly forget him. But i just had to be put behind him. Oh well. /:

So yeah, just as i predicted, we never exchanged any words. But i knew, deep down, i was hoping he'd talk to me. Not to ask for something, but to talk to me casually like a friend. We've never done that since Sec1..

Its okay, i told myself. Just love him silently like you have been doing since Sec1.

So everything went well, i didn't make a fool of myself in front of him and stuff on that day itself. Flagbearing was for CCA councillors, so me being the only non-CCA councillor there was pretty pathetic. But i had Sam, so i was contented. Anyw Sam said she didn't really have friends in the council too, and my presence was great for her too. (:

Oh and just before we marched in, Sam actually told me, "you still like  -bleep-  right!!"

Ohmygah. How did she know?! No one knows! ): i asked her how she knew, she said she just knew. She could feel it, or something like that. Oh gosh. I thought everyone thought i liked -rawr- .

So i guess she's the only one who knows the truth.

During our break after the entering of the CCA colours (we only had to march in and march out at the end), i sat opposite Sam and watched her gobble down her dinner. Then she told me to turn around and look at the sky, cos it was beautiful. I turned and looked. Then i realised  -bleep-  was sitting right at a spot such that looking at the sky was also looking straight at him. I turned back, pretending nothing happened, and just agreed that the sky looked beautiful. Then Sam started giggling, and it was then i realised she actually did that on purpose. ): then she kept asking me to turn back and look again, but i refused cos i knew she was teasin me. Then she was like, "hahahahahahaha why your face so red!" ))): so mean aiyo.

After Hildan Torch, we waited for our parents together. Then , i asked her if i was being annoying by holding on to him for four years. She said no la. That was kinda comforting i guess? /: i asked her if he knows that i still like him. She said, "i don't think so?" okay, even more comforting.

So yeap thats it about my little experience of this year's Hildan Torch. I'm happy actually. I liked watching him from behind. I'm contented. (:

Ohhhhh! One more thing. Last Tuesday was the CCA Colours presentation too. Shane had to announce the awards stuff, so again i had to stand in for her. No, i wasn't standing beside -bleep-. Not so lucky haha.

It was unfortunate. I stood too long and didn't wriggle my toes (to allow blood flow), so i felt really dizzy after. I couldn' t even stand anymore, so i told Shane and she 扶 me to the benches which they set up for the photo-taking. I was actually alr sick to begin with, i was sick since Friday. In the end i was brought to the P.E room. At that time, all i could think of was, did  -bleep- see me like that? If he did, was he concerned about me? when Shane came in, i asked her, "were everyone asking about me?" She said, "yeah didn't you hear the noise they made outside?" but that wasn't what i wanted to hear. I wanted her to say something like, "yeah, especially  -bleep- ! He kept asking what happened and if you were fine." ah, what was i thinking. Shane doesn't know i still love him so much. And why would he bother? He probably thought nothing of it. i was then brought to the sick bay. I lay there until 9.15am before going back to class. The whole time i was there i kept thinking of him. If only he could come visit me, i wished. But nah, that just remained as a wish that never came true.

Now that all the events are over, i guess i won't get to see him and be so close to him anymore. Sigh.

P.S
Simple Plan is in Singapore already!! Their concert's tonight, which would be a great thing if i could go. Now i just feel disappointed. ): sigh, shall just wait for their vlog on their trip to Singapore then.

P.P.S
What a long blog post. Didn't realise it was this long. O:
Mind filled with so many thoughts..
@ 15:33
I feel so so so upset right now. So many things running through my mind. So many unhappy thoughts, to be exact.

I'm at a loss, i don't know what to do. I keep thinking about it, like what i should do, when should i do...

I have no one to talk to about this. Even if i have someone, i don't know how to put all my feelings and thoughts into words. When i say it out, it sounds like some simple problem that i could have fixed on my own. But when i'm actually on my own, i have no idea what to do...

What should i do? My blog seems to be the only listener now.
No one reads this blog. No one visits it, except for those tagboard advertisers. Its like, talking to a wall.
But surprisingly, talking to this "wall" seems so much better than talking to my friends.

Why?

I really want to talk to my friends about this. But, who would listen to all these crap? My friends are all those who don't give a shit about relationships. They're those who are free. Free from all these problems . So if i confide in them, i guess they'd just feel like its a shitty thing to hear. Maybe talking to them about things they don't bother about makes them annoyed.

I really don't know who i can talk to. Definitely not the online counsellor our school introduced to us this year. I wouldn't want to tell such secrets so some stranger online .


So many things to talk about.
Friday, 13 January 2012 @ 00:27
Have been thinking about blogging some stuffs recently, but they're all gonna be really long posts so i kinda have no time to post. And i can't do it with my kakak around, i don't want her to see.

So yeah. Shall try find a time to post it through my phone then. Probably when i have nothing to do and i'm not watching my Korean dramas hahahahahaha. Yes, i'm currently quite addicted to Korean dramas. Which is not a good thing for me cos its my O LEVEL YEAR. What the heck am i doing . 

And i just went to Ngee Ann Poly's website to look up on Veterinary Bioscience (yes i am quite interested about it and i feel like taking that course) and reading about it just made me more interested in it. Then i saw the entry requirements. Okay, they basically just require at least a pass for English, Math/A-math, and my Sciences. So shooooould be fine. Then, i went on to see the cut-off point for 2011. And then to my horror, i saw a SINGLE DIGIT. FFFFFFFUUUUUUU ITS A 9 !! A FREAKING NINE! My 2011 L1R5 is 21 and L1R2B2 15 i think! How am i supposed to reach 9?! 

I feel like crying alr . If i don't take Vetinary Bioscience, idk what course am i gonna take. I am not interested in going JC, seriously. I can't take the stress i think . Gosh. 


Guess all i can do i chiong all the way this year (of course not losing all my energy by the second half of the year) and get a good score, so i have more choices open to me. ): 

Good luck to myself. Sighhhhhh.


Currently finding an A-math tutor too. Mdm Tey teaches so fast, i can't catch up ): My mind's too slow for her gah.

OH AND, SIMPLE PLAN IS COMING TO SINGAPORE REAL SOON! 3 MORE DAYS! But BOO i can't go for their concert! :'( So upset. I shall just wait for their vlog of their tour in Singapore to be uploaded on Youtube then. But its so brief, they'll just talk about where they are now, say some words of the place, then show little snippets of the concert then DONE. 

Nothing beats watching them live . Oh well ): 


Alright, i gotta sleep now. School tomorrow. G'night!(:
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Monday, 2 January 2012 @ 13:53
A liiiiittle too late, but HAPPY NEW YEAR! ((:

Hope 2012 would be much much better than 2011, cos its an important year for me /: O'Levels, sighhhhhh.

Hope i can get myself to mug for tests/exams.